Told you so……

As parents, we very often have the opportunity to say “I told you so,” or “You should have listened.” We tell them many things so they do not have to touch the perverbial stove to see if it is hot. We teach them lessons, give examples, and sometimes even fib a little so they will hopefully listen, and not have to learn the hard way. My mother had, I swear, a hundred “cousins” who somehow did everything I wanted to do and they all died from doing it. She may have also heard from a neighbour’s aunt who went to church with a man who knew a lady who knew a guy that tried doing something and died. Shoo-ee that was a mouthful!

So one thing I am pretty picky about, are my children’s table manners. No elbows on the table (this isn’t a prison yard), no chewing with your mouth open (you sound like a hieffer), no eating with your hands (situational of course but not mashed potatoes lol), and chew all of your food before another bite (said for good reason). I am not mommy dearest, but I figure these manners are good for everyone to have. My kids however think they are completely unnecessary, and it is just me being bitchy.

Well, last night, my youngest (5) learned the hard way. This little booger was preparing to take a bath. She had to potty. After about twenty minutes she begins to cry. Daddy ran to the rescue! She screams, “My poop is stuck!” Daddy bends her over. He proceeds to pull an entire string of asparagus! Sorry, I know it is yucky! He fought back every urge to laugh, and then proceeds to tell me. I was not so skilled at holding my laughter ha ha. I look at her and I ask “Why did this happen?” She replies, “I didn’t chew my food.” “See! Mommy isn’t full of shit huh?” I said laughing. “I told you so babygirl.”

As I watched the little lightbulb turn on in her head, I revelled in the fact that my children, everyday, are one step closer to that stage of,” Hmmm maybe Mommy and Daddy DO know what they are talking about!” So for all you parents out there, I hope you have an equally funny win today. I hope you take comfort in the fact that even though kids can be tiny assholes sometimes, you are the parent! You are smarter! You are bigger! You are the boss!